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Fuck The Deficit! People Got No Jobs! People Got No Money! (Echoing Charles Pierce)

If Ayn Rand and the Free Market had sex, their child would look like this, and he'd do everything he can to privatize your grandma's medicare and cut back your grandpa's social security. For the deficit, man!

Is Barack Obama a radical secular socialist, or is he a Kenyan Muslim dictator? His probably racist opponents (yeah, I said it) seem to simultaneously hold to both conspiracies, which, though contradictory, makes a warped sort of sense when you consider that anti-Obama adherents are a melting-Tea Party-pot of self-imagined John Galts that mistake the silver spoon up their butt for bootstraps and Midwestern yahoos who think Adam and Eve rode to school on dinosaurs seven days after the world was created 6000 years ago. These people would think Obama forged his birth certificate, because you have to be born in America to be president and, well, look at Obama! He doesn’t look like any of the previous presidents. (He’s too tan!)

At any rate, if these loonies would remove their heads from their posteriors and, I dunno, maybe read the “Muslim” (or is he a Godless secularist?) Obama’s recent Easter speech* about the Resurrection of Jesus Christ they’d realize that Obama is no radical, he’s just a slightly left of center Christian politician. A socialist!? If only! Obama is a centrist war-hawk Democrat, just like Bill Clinton. I wish Obamacare was single payer socialized medicine to cover everyone. Instead of doing the best thing and putting the evil health care insurance companies out of business, Obama took the only compromise he could slide through a Congress of Democrats, no less, giving those HMOs boatloads of taxpayer money as a compromise to get a few more millions covered. It’s better than nothing, and Obama deserves credit for getting what health care through he could, but the narrative is off when Obama gets called a socialist for forking over billions in taxpayer money to greedy insurance companies looking for any pre-existing condition to not pay for your dying granny’s surgery.

*Which was a good speech, I might add, notwithstanding the sneering secularists who see any and all public religiosity as a sign of impending theocracy and are just as annoying, in their own way, as Christian fundamentalists.

It’s not “socialism” that’s the problem in this country, or bullshit imaginations of it. It’s that pretend Texas cowboy from a rich New England family who bankrupt this country with two unjust wars. It’s that Ayn Rand-worshipping** Alan Greenspan who hates government so much he worked for it as Federal Reserve Chairman and chose to deregulate Wall Street so his asshole financial buddies from Goldman Sachs could give out shit loans to people who couldn’t afford houses, knowing those toxic mortgages could be flipped onto gullible investors, making room for Goldman and others to bet the other way on the very failure of those toxic assets so that when the shit mortgages did go belly up, Goldman, et al could profit twice, no, three times (!) thanks to the eventually multi-billion dollar government bailout to fix a financial industry and national economy destroyed through the very collusion of hands-off Federal Reserve government lackeys and money-grubbing Wall Street grifters.

**If atheists want to criticize Christians for Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell, which is fair enough, we get to criticize atheists for Ayn Rand, whose followers high up in government and finance have caused far more havoc to our nation than dumb creationists trying to get intelligent design into biology classrooms.

And, yet, after the government bankrupts this country with expensive wars and rich guy tax breaks, and the financial industry robs a thousand times over what Bonny and Clyde could ever steal, Republican politicians deign to give stern lectures about austerity and tightening belts and paying the debt, right after blaming poor people for being lazy and entitled, as if some guy who failed a drug test and can’t get a job at Wal-Mart because he got high last week is the reason this country is in the dumper. I don’t care about the Scary Deficit Monster. I will echo Esquire’s Charles Pierce. “Fck the Deficit! People Got No Jobs! People Got No Money!” I’ll be damned if grandpa’s Social Security and Medicare get trimmed to pay for rich people tax cuts and justified as a “shared” national sacrifice when government charlatans and Wall Street grifters are responsible for this collapse. I cannot say that reelecting Barack Obama will fix this national mess. But electing Mitt Romney’s silver spoon will only perpetuate this nation’s descent into an aristocracy.


About keithstache

I'm Keith Hernandez's mustache. And you're not. I like bad baseball teams and good beer.


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